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I found this job about 9 years ago and love it..any other takers?

POSITION : Mom, Mommy, Mama,Ma Dad, Daddy, Dada, Pa,Pop JOB DESCRIPTION : Long term, team players needed, forchallenging, permanent work in an often chaotic environment. Candidates must possess excellent communication and organizational skills and be willing to work variable hours, which will include evenings and weekends and frequent 24 hour shifts on call. Some overnight travel required, including trips to primitive camping sites on rainy weekends and endless sports tournaments in far away cities! Travel expenses not reimbursed. Extensive courier duties also required. RESPONSIBILITIES : The rest of your life. Must be willing to be hated, at least temporarily, until someone needs $5.Must be willing to bite tongue repeatedly. Also, must possess the physical stamina of a pack mule and be able to go from zero to 60 mph in three seconds flat in case, this time, the screams from the backyard are not someone just crying wolf. Must be willing to face stimulating technical challenges, such as small gadget repair, mysteriously sluggish toilets and stuck zippers. Must screen phone calls, maintain calendars and coordinate production of multiple homework projects.Must have ability to plan and organize social gatherings for clients of all ages and mental outlooks. Must be a willing to be indispensable one minute, an embarrassment the next. Must handle assembly and product safety testing of a half million cheap, plastic toys, and battery operated devices. Must always hope for the best but be prepared for the worst. Must assume final, complete accountability for the quality of the end product.. Responsibilities also include floor maintenance and janitorial work throughout the facility. POSSIBILITY FOR ADVANCEMENT & PROMOTION : None. Your job is to remain in the same position for years, without complaining, constantly retraining and updating skills so that those in your charge can ultimately surpass you. PREVIOUS EXPERIENCE : None required unfortunately. On-the-job training offered on a continually exhausting basis. WAGES AND COMPENSATION : Get this! You pay them! Offering frequent raises and bonuses. A balloon payment is due when they turn 18 because of the assumption that college will help them become financially independent. When you die, you give them whatever is left.The oddest thing about this reverse-salary scheme is that you actually enjoy it and wish you could only do more. BENEFITS : While no health or dental insurance, no pension, no tuition reimbursement, no paid holidays and no stock options are offered; this job supplies limitless opportunities for personal growth, unconditional love, and free hugs and kisses for life if you play your cards right.

Public Comments

  1. Too much type. Yea I like being a mom. Although I do work outside the home as well.
  2. Are you kidding? I'm *this close* to retirement.
  3. I absolutely LOVE being a Mom. But I also love being “me” too. I’m more than just a Mommy, more than just a wife, more than just the purchasing manager. I have a name, I have a personality, I wouldn’t trade my little man for the world, BUT, being a Mom doesn’t define me. I’m sure I’ll get thumbs down galore for this, but hey, being a Mom is just a piece of the pie!
  4. yea best job in the world and very fortunate to be able to do it but yet very exhausting,but worth it yes.although i do like to take time for other things in life to.
  5. I hold the same position! And love it!!! Thanks for the chuckle.
  6. I have taken that job to,but I am a mom and I understand the attitude's. I understand what its like to carry around a 30lb 19 month old because she is scarred of the sand. To sleep on the floor next to my child's bed when they are sick. Also to not be able to eat a full meal because they want some. I also understand what its like to eat my child's left overs, being told that "Mommy you have a booger up your nose" in public in the middle of a store." Having my keys chewed on, and all the diapers co-pays, wipes and formula. Money that I will not get back. But I swear that it is worth every penny of it.
  7. It sounds wonderful, however, I beg to differ on the Possibility for Advancement or Promotion because I was hired for the position of Mama (nowadays, I have the same duties and perks but the title differs ever so differently, Mother) nearly 14 years ago and I was promised a possibility in advancement to that of Grandma where my duties and expenses lessen just slightly where as the benefits increase due to the fact I have the privilege of relieving myself of the trying assignments by delegating them off on my subordinates, Mama and Dad.
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