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How can I help him? Extremely volatile personality when faced with criticism...?

My boyfriend has issues. Probably very serious ones. He is extremely depresssive, has LOW LOW LOW self esteem and is never happy. Granted, things in his life arent perfect but instead of taking hits as they come and looking for a way to improve his life he takes every single setback as the end of the world. Example, he is "struggling" in bio and math since he currently has a C in both. He works very hard at it but has also made some mistakes that have set him back. Every time he goes to class he bemoans his horrible teacher and says she is a C*** and she just wants him to drop the class and he just isnt as smart as me and im too perfect and rubbing it in his face when I give him study tips or point out how he could have studied instead of going out one day... He also hates women. In general he has nothing nice to say about them as a whole and its starting to really hurt. He says that I am an exception to the rule but in general all women are bitches, users, fake, backstabbers, etc. Last night when we were watching Dexter (tv show) and Maria backstabbed Deb, I said "I cant believe she did that" and he said "She's a woman.". This bothered me and I told him that it was sexist and men do things like that as well, citing a few examples... Later on we were talking and he came back to that incident and said he has faults like hes sexist and I said "yes, you are" and it blew up. He started crying and saying How could I call him that when i knew what his expereinces were (he has had one bad ex gf and one bitch girl former friend that led to his opinion of women). I said that I understood hating those individuals but to then generalize it to all women and say that we are all like that was hurtful and it bothered me especially since he is so anti-racist and I know its not his desire to be hateful to a group of people just based on them being a member of the group (when it comes to race or sexual preference at least). But the real problem is that he is like this with ALL criticism and htis is certainly not the first time he has gotten extremely emotional over a small bit of criticism. He has a temper and throws fits when he doesn't get his way or life gets hard. He will rage and scream and say hurtful things and project all his shortcomings onto the other people around him. He can get VERY mean and its so that you cant say anything to him about his bad habits or you get a HUGE drama. Last night he started sobbing and blubbering and holding his breath and letting snot drip all down his face because he didnt like that I pointed out how he can be sexist. He KNOWS its sexist and not ok, and if I were to bash men then he wouldnt like it one bit but he acts like i told him he was going to be forced to live under a bridge.... Whats wrong with him and how can I help him? He is like this to everyone and his parents are scared of him. His mom cried to me a month ago because she is so scared to tell him that he cant do something because of how nasty and overreactive he gets. Sorry this si so long, I just don't know where else to turn. He has no health insurance or I would have told him to get a counselor, but that would likely blow up in my face as well.

Public Comments

1. For some time I am following with interest your questions I still have little evidence to fully understand your choices and your real problems. But I want to help you, and then you can count on my interest and also on my knowledge ... greetings!